The idea to start this blog was born during the most challenging time of life. I was graduating from my master’s and was going through huge changes in my personal life. In the midst of these hectic times all of a sudden, I was at an idyllic meditation centre Dhamma Pajjota in the North-Eastern part of Belgium, near the border with The Netherlands. It was high summer, the sun was high, and the moon was bright, the nature was alive. When I booked the meditation course 5 months in advance, I was not expecting my life to be turned upside-down and I was not expecting anything of the whole experience. As proven many times before, ignorance is bliss. So, there I was, meditating 10 hours each day for 10 days, going through the hardest internal struggle I could ever imagine.
As I am a true believer in the fact that everything happens for a reason, I believe that I was meant to go through that experience that particular period of time. Some gentle yet firm force has made sure that I would be there in the end of June 2018. No pain, no gain as they say, right? Before going on the retreat, I did not know what it was going to be like, I did not know what my daily schedule will look like, I did not read about experiences of other people. I found out about this meditation technique from a complete stranger on an airport when changing flights. We engaged in a conversation because I was running late, was a bit stressed and met him in the line to check-in. He was an oasis of peace. His energy and aura were saying “I am calm”. He was going to Thailand to meditate for 60 (!) days in silence. He told me about Vipassana meditation and when I asked him what it is like, he answered “It’s hard to say, it’s almost scientific”. He did not tell me much about the meditation nor the retreat. It was his energy and spirit that touched me so much and told me that I had to try this out for myself. I thought to myself that one day I want to be this stranger who changes somebody’s life. I want my energy to have positive impact on others. If I can get there by meditating in silence, I will give it a shot.
If there is a seed of an idea planted in my head, I won’t let go off it until there are fruits on the tree to be harvested. That is why 8 months after meeting Mr. Vipassana Meditator I was attending my first Vipassana retreat (feels like it’s a good time and place to express my gratitude to you sir, you have changed my life, thank you dear universe for making our paths cross like that). I reached the rock bottom during my first Vipassana. I was so low, I had no idea that I could go to such depths of my psychic. I had no idea how miserable, frustrated, impatient and devastated I could feel. I had no clue how exhausted I could feel. I was not aware of the relationship I had with myself. I have learned lots of things about myself. I conquered my darkest demons. If this wasn’t already enough, my internal subconscious struggles have materialised themselves in the form of dreams, thoughts and physical sensations I did not know I was capable of feeling. As Goenka (Vipassana teacher) said, during one of the discourses we listened to during the retreat, it is as if you were undergoing a surgery of your subconsciousness. You cut yourself open and you drill inside, experiencing your feelings like that is the only way to let it go, heal and grow.
The idea for plot-twist came in a dream. One day I woke up with a vision of this platform in my head, I stayed in bed for a bit longer thinking about what it will be like, what it will look like and what the purpose of it will be. First of all, I am here to tell you about this meditation technique. I have a message to spread and this is the beginning of it. I could talk about it for hours and days but even then, I would not do justice to what this experience meant for me. It was absolutely life-changing and the most profound experience that pushed me forward in life and directed me on my path. If you are reading this and hearing of Vipassana for the first time, you are on your path too. You are reading this because you are ready to experience it for yourself. If you want to get in touch with the only important person in your life – yourself, do yourself the favour of not talking to anyone but YOURSELF for 10 days. Let yourself be loved and feel the compassion during this retreat. You won’t stop seeing the benefits of that until the rest of your existence. You will not regret.
Pure love and compassion exist and are waiting for you to be discovered. Follow your path, learn how to love and let yourself be loved.